Emotional Healing 4

“Absolute honesty isn’t always the most diplomatic nor the safest form of communication with emotional beings”

Ah, it sounds simple enough, being “open hearted”, I mean why not feel Whole, Inclusive, Loving, Free-from-Fear, Relaxed and Content (for example) eh ?

Yet for anyone / anybody who is serious about their Spiritual Path such a state-of-being isn’t always accessible or naturally available eh ?

From experience, Introspectiveness is a necessary element of the “journey” inasmuch as you are attempting to uncover the root of your Unhappiness or Suffering [1], to really touch-upon the Inner-Landscape that sometimes seems to “block” the feeling-of-freedom each of us inherently felt in our Childhood eh ?

So what happened ? It’s my contention each of us are a “product-of-circumstance” [POC] with our early years fully shaped by our parents (or caregivers) in the context of Education (and by Society as a whole) such that there was no control whatsoever over the process eh ? Now later in life, you could argue that your present behaviour stems precisely from HOW you were Emotionally-Cared-For (or not) as a Child eh ?

Thus it is perhaps all-too-easy to point-the-finger-of-blame at one’s Parents (and probably Society) but in so doing it is ignoring the fact that they themselves were also brought up in a simliar-non-volitional-environment and are likewise a product-of-circumstance too eh ?

A suggestion : Observe yourself before projecting “blame” onto (supposed) “others” [2] as if it’s ALL their Fault eh ? 🙏

Now as you “look within” (sometimes painful) memories are allowed to surface bringing to mind their emotional-content eh ? This is where it’s imperative, I’d say, not to get “carried away” (by the contents) but to remain present (the same as with ALL thoughts) and simply allow it to “pass through” (as if reliving it) in a non-attached manner eh ? Because if you accept my proposal [POC] above then truly there is no-one who can be “pinned down” as the real origin of the Emotional Trauma eh ?

Oh, for those that aren’t Aware, practicing Self-Enquiry (asking who am I ?) is, from experience, akin to shining-the-light-of-attention upon INNER dynamic processes whereupon the aggregates-of-the-self are seen as non-constant, in flux, ever-changing, impermanent thus suddenly the ASSUMPTION of a self-entity is cut-through i.e. it loses its seeming “solidity” eh ? But in reading this I do hope you are taking into account the principle of my website which is that it is founded upon the concept of Anatta (no-self) !

Oh, the point is if there is no-self-entity-in-control WHO exists to exercise such “free will” eh ? 😉

“My life is like shattered glass,” said the visitor. “My soul is tainted with evil. Is
there any hope for me?”
“Yes,” said the Master. “There is something whereby each broken thing is bound
again and every stain made clean.”
“Whom do I forgive?”
“Everyone. Life, God, your neighbor. And especially yourself.”
“How is that done?”
“By understanding that no one is to blame,” said the Master. “No one.”

From : Conversations with the Masters (2003)

The Nature of the Mind has never changed ~ Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche [3]

Thoughts manifest themselves within emptiness and are reabsorbed into it like a face appears and disappears in a mirror; the face has never been in the mirror, and when it ceases to be reflected in it, it has not really ceased to exist. The mirror itself has never changed. So, before departing on the spiritual path, we remain in the so-called “impure” state of samsara, which is, in appearance, governed by ignorance. When we commit ourselves to that path, we cross a state where ignorance and wisdom are mixed. At the end, at the moment of Enlightenment, only pure wisdom exists. But all the way along this spiritual journey, although there is an appearance of transformation, the nature of the mind has never changed: it was not corrupted on entry onto the path, and it was not improved at the time of realization.

[1] Oh, I suggest it can help illuminate “difficulties” (if there are any) in relation to your “work” environment, or with your partner / spouse, Friends and Family etc
[2] The Map Is Not The Territory !
[3] The Nature of the Mind has never changed

4 thoughts on “Emotional Healing

  1. Reply Simon Aug 29,2021 9:59 am

    The Vanity of Metaphysics : “If concepts do not represent reality, [1] conceptual knowledge of reality must be considered erroneous. That is demonstrated many times in Buddhism. Buddha always told his disciples not to spend their time and energies in metaphysical speculation. Each time he was asked a question of a metaphysical kind, he remained silent. He directed his disciples toward practical efforts”

    From : Thich Nhat Hanh’s Zen Keys: A Guide to Zen Practice

    [1] : The Map Is Not The Territory ! 😉

  2. Reply Simon Aug 30,2021 10:23 am

    Throughout Buddhist teachings, the answer to karmic suffering difficult to accept has been the development of compassion for such suffering beings


    … narrative plays a crucial role in teaching people how to have emotions through cultivating an object’s value and demonstrating appropriate actions towards that object. Stories like Romeo and Juliet teach us that the object of our romantic love is important above all other potential objects and that such love is its most real only when you are willing to die for its loss. The life story of the Buddha teaches readers to value mental equilibrium over hedonistic pleasure. Such evaluative judgements naturally lead to the creation of moral and ethical agents who value particular kinds of objects, relationships, and actions towards those objects. At the same time, through following the characters and participating in their inner world, narrative also develops a “potential space” in which the reader can imagine the experience and inner world of another person … “imagination helps us to exchange our self for others and meditate on the practice of taking and giving. It helps the practitioner to visualize and, somehow, to recreate situations of sufferings and misery. Through this practice, one is able to attain solidarity with the suffering of others”

    From : “Tears Like Fluttering Leaves” as found in Revue d’Etudes Tibétaines Number 50, Juin 2019 – Tibetan Religion and the Senses

  3. Reply Simon Sep 16,2021 6:00 pm

    Whenever the Dalai Lama talks about forgiveness, he likes to use as an example the story of Lopon-la, a Lhasa monk he knew before the Chinese occupation.

    “After I escaped from Tibet, Lopon-la put in prison by Chinese,” the Dalai Lama told me. “He stayed there eighteen years. When he finally free, he came to India. For twenty years, I did not see him. But he seemed the same. Of course looked older. But physically OK. His mind still sharp after so many years in prison. He was still same gentle monk.

    “He told me the Chinese forced him to denounce his religion. They tortured him many times in prison. I asked him whether he was ever afraid. Lopon-la then told me: ‘Yes, there was one thing I was afraid of. I was afraid I may lose compassion for the Chinese.’

    “I was very moved by this, and also very inspired.”

    The Dalai Lama paused. He tugged on his maroon robes and wrapped them tightly around him.

    “Now. Lopon-la. Forgiveness helped him in prison. Because of forgiveness, his bad experience with Chinese not got worse. Mentally and emotionally, he didn’t suffer too much. He knew he could not escape. So, better to accept reality than to be traumatized by it.”

    The Dalai Lama is convinced that Lopon-la’s power of forgiveness helped him survive all those years in prison without irreparable damage to his psyche. On one of my European trips with the Dalai Lama, I met a man whose life, like Lopon-la’s, was enhanced by forgiveness

    From : The Wisdom of Forgiveness : Intimate Journeys and Conversations

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